I've said it before but I must say it again --- Reality shows bear no resemblance to reality... and neither does the news. Surely most people realize the reality shows aren't real, but what the news media presents is just as distorted, and I'm not sure folks realize it. If a 'news' event was a usual and customary activity from everyday life, it wouldn't make the news. They only report the sensational, and unfortunately they seem very fond of the negatively sensational. I wish the news hounds would chase good news as doggedly as they sniff out bad news.

The media doesn't talk about ordinary life but by plastering the anomalies on the evening news people are misled into thinking their lives are full of these anomalous events. They aren't. We hear about murders in the news daily, but how many real peoples' lives are actually touched by a murder ever, much less daily? I'd like to see the news reported more realistically, in context. If they report one school shooting, I think they should be required to report the number of schools that went through the day with no shooting. I'm not saying that we should discount lives lost or affected by such events, but give it some perspective, instead of making it sound as though these things happen on everyone's doorstep, all day, everyday. They don't.

It would get really boring really quickly if the media had to report the statistics, if they had to reveal the actual percentages of the incidents they report relative to the actual experiences of the rest of the six and a half billion people living ordinary everyday lives on this planet.

But it's not the media's fault. It's human nature to get all caught up in drama. We really need to get over it. Addiction to drama is what causes dramatic events, whether we're committing them or revelling in the reporting of them. For heaven's sake... for humanity's sake... read a freakin book, watch a movie, have a nightmare. Get yourself a good cry or knee jerk reaction or shiver of fear or fit of rage without actually doing damage or waiting for someone to do it so you can drool over it or feel better because it didn't happen to you.

We now have the capability of synthesizing human experience so convincingly that we don't have to do the actual harm necessary for getting the adrenalin fix. Sheesh Can't we start doing all this crap to each other from memory, getting the emotional fix virtually if we need it, then just move on? Let's skip the vicarious thrill of feeding off the real-life tragedy of a few. It's twisted. We should have evolved past this.

The plot is worn. I don't need the drama. I don't understand people who do. I feel quite alive without it. And when I don't, I write myself a little story or find one to suit, then go on living my real life.

We will soon have a yard. Not the 3ft measurement, but the kind of yard that's lying on the ground around the house. What we had was dirt and builder rubble dotted by weeds. I really didn't mind it all that much, but there are maintenance and erosion issues and it really wasn't all that nice to look at. We have no use for a barefoot lawn and absolutely no interest in maintaining one. I guess what we're getting qualifies as landscaping but it involves very little of the traditional elements.

Now in the past, at other places we've lived, there have been agitated discussions concerning the yard. This would be me nagging the spouse about maintenance. I don't DO lawnmowing. My responsibilities are all IN the house. Period. But, spouse works six days a week and so I didn't nag about the mowing too much. Besides the neighbors were often anxious to do that. They didn't seem to share our appreciation for letting nature take its course. In fact, the only reason I nagged was knowing the neighbors were gonna.

What we usually ended up doing was hiring a lawn service when we could afford it, or simply waiting til the neighbors bitched and got someone with a bush hog to come out and cut it all down to the dirt. Oh, we've tried killing it all too. That only sorta works and only til the next growing season because grass and weeds are persistent.

I have actually threatened to concrete a yard and paint it green, but I know that isn't nice to Mother Nature.

However, in this development we're in now, there's a really rather convenient sort of yard option. This whole village was intended to be a retirement resort with heavy emphasis on golfing. Now that means there's a lot of maintenance of golf courses (of which there are seven), but the old fart golfers don't want to waste any time in their golden years mowing. Neither do we!

Their solution was to rock it. Yeah, there are whole yards here, lots of them, which are pebbled over. There's lots of natural woodsy green space in the common areas behind all the houses, as well as in the undeveloped lots between houses. Then, unless a homeowner is really fond of the vibration of a mower handle gripped in their hands, or addicted to the buzz of a weedeater, the other yards look more like uniform creek beds.

SO, that's what we're having done. I've had four young handsome mexican fellows and a couple of average white guys milling around the outside of my house for a few days. We opted to leave the back of our lot all natural and the rest has been covered with a black mesh fabric to let water go through but prevent weeds from sprouting up. On top of the mesh, they've dumped and raked a layer of small neutral colored stone. They call it 'river rock' and it looks like that, small stones with the rough edges knocked off by flowing water. I'm sure it's broken, tumbled, and graded in a plant around here somewhere, but it's real rock and not bad to look at.

Thus, our yard is pebbled over too now. The landscape is developing as they put in some borders along the sidewalk, the driveway, and around a couple of trees in the front yard. These areas are filled with high grade top soil, then layered in the mesh, then layered in 'chocolate rock' which is the same as the river rock only darker brown, to mimic mulch, I guess.

Then, when all that's done, they'll be adding some huge decorative boulders here and there in these darker "islands" of chocolate rock. After that, a few selected low-maintainance evergreen plantings will liven it up.

It's kind of an expensive investment up front, but not over the long haul when you count the maintenance issues of a real yard.

Besides, while these fellows have been around, I've been able to practice my Spanish a little and I do so love to watch men work.

Why don't I do it? Why don't I do all the writing I feel I want to do? I have half a dozen good projects on my storyboards. But I can't seem to dig in. I guess I am not compelled enough or I would. My excuses include menopause which has my sleep totally discombobulated which steals my concentration and physical energy. That's quasi-legit, but I know it's possible to get into something so deeply that I forget time and space and my physical being. I feel like I'm killing time by beating it to death. I just keep finding stuff to occupy my day and enough of my mind to shut out the will to write. It's harder to create than play freebie poker online or watch TV or fiddle with a hundred other little projects. Sometimes I think about the time I'm wasting. Other times I know I'm too tired and I feel too scatterbrained to do anything worthwhile. My writing projects are dear to me but daunting too. I mentally glance over them and get worn out just thinking about all that needs to be done. I wonder why I should bother too. I mean, it's not like I'm going to write the great american novel. But part of me... part of me really wants to finish what I think are great ideas, even if it's just for me.

I gotta keep urging myself on with quotes like this:

"A professional writer is an amateur who didn't quit." ~ Richard Bach

"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not. Nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent." ~ Calvin Coolidge

"Don't let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might just as well put that passing time to the best possible use." ~ Earl Nightingale

I should think more about that. Maybe I'll sleep on it. hehe

Your Element Is Air

You dislike conflict, and you've been able to rise above the angst of the world. And when things don't go your way, you know they'll blow over quickly. Easygoing, you tend to find joy from the simple things in life. You roll with the punches, and as a result, your life is light and cheerful. You find it easy to adapt to most situations, and you're an open person. With you, what you see is what you get... and people love that!

What's Your Element?

Usolicited advice to no one in particular:
Choices. It's all about choices - making them and living with them. If you are not where you want to be, realize that you made choices to get you where you are. No one dropped your life into your lap. You collected it, configured it, as you went along. Maybe it was passive, you allowed it to happen instead of actively creating it, BUT if so, you chose to be passive. If you don't like it... change it... make new choices. And remember, you can always choose to be content with what you have, where you are, and who you are. That doesn't mean you have to stop changing or making choices. It just means you need to find a comfortable base to work from. If you're not there, get there, make it. Find out what you need and reconfigure your life to get it. If you are miserable, you are choosing to be miserable, because you are choosing not to change what is making you miserable OR you are choosing to feel miserable about your circumstances, whether they justify it or not. Accept it or change it. Either way, the process always begins with you, here and now. Always.

It may be worn out, but it's still wisdom: There are three ways to deal with life and even find your peace in it...
Accept the things you cannot change.
Change the things you can.
Know the difference.

Before the year is out... I believe there will be smoke from a chimney for the first time in 27 years, signaling not only a changing of the guard, but the remaking of the entire edifice. If they want to continue on, they must embrace the reality of diversity, which has been ignored, even quashed, from the time the structure was built. This change is not yet written, but without major rennovation, the old structure will collapse.

This is not only true of the institution in question, but all such institutions. Religious, scientific, and political edifices have all become very frail, though they still seem solid on the surface. However, their structure has been disassembling, more rapidly as time passes. Soon the frameworks will be shown in their true hollow condition, like light through lace, and prove too insubstantial to stand. Their facades will no longer be enough to sustain them.

But this does not bode complete anarchy. Structure has been developing, just not in support of the outdated frameworks. When the facades collapse, the new structures will be revealed, already in existence, already functioning, for over time they have come into being to fill the needs left by the gradual failure of the inflexible obsolete forms. They will work even better when they no longer have to fight 'the establishment'.

There will be debris to clear out from the collapse, but in cleaning up, new connections will be found, further supporting the newer more flexible systems. No longer will we build from stone too heavy to move, nor direct from perches too high to see life on the ground. We'll work more organically, more dynamically, so that change can be made as change is needed, instead of years after it would have been useful.

Religion, Science, and Politics will learn they are all looking at the same picture and will each find ways to describe it so they can understand each other, and allow each other to exist without turmoil, and even work together eventually. This change will of course take much longer than merely a year, but the fire for this has been set and we'll all be better for it... when the smoke clears.

PS - Yes, I am predicting the current Pope will die this year and that his successor will likely be Arinze, the "Black Pope" from Nigeria.

The times they are a'changing....

Best wishes for the New Year to one and all. I didn't make any New Year's resolutions this year. I rarely do. I learned long ago that I don't stick to them very well. The only one I recall being serious about was the one I made when I was 30 yrs old. I vowed not to get married at 30. I was aware that a lot of people go through a life evaluation around 30 yrs old and they sometimes make dumb decisions based on someone else's goals or benchmarks. I was aware that 30 was kind of an old maid deadline. I preferred to stay single than to give in to such nonsense. Damned if I was going to let that sort of pressure get me stuck in a marriage that might or might not be right for me.

I hated being 30. It was like a bad joke. No one is really 30. They're pretending to be 29 or they're something else, but not precisely 30. I was glad to turn 31. At that point, it was like the pressure was off. Anyone who thought I should be whatever by 30 had given up? ;) I however felt like I'd managed to dodge all the bullets and got on with my life!

No idea what got me into that tangent, but such is the way with quicksilver. *grin* You never know where it's gonna flow...

Christmas with my family... There's just no way to describe how wonderful it is to be with my family, anytime. We're so BradyBunch that it might frighten some people. I don't care. I love it. For me, it's normal to love and be loved by the people to whom you're related. We don't just pay each other lip service owed by an unwritten creed of how family members should be. We actually do care about each other. We enjoy each others company. We have fun together! We enjoy our history together and look forward to where our lives will take us. There is a deep compassionate connection and a promise of continuity which I wish every person could feel with their own family.

I am the oldest of five children. All of us are married. The other four have children. There have been divorces and some blending, but I count all my nieces and nephews equally, regardless of bloodlines. My parents are terrific role models. They are just damned good people, to us and to everyone they meet. I try to emulate that, as do my siblings. Their children are learning the same. My grandparents were marvelous people too. I don't know how many generations of us have been decent citizens of the world, but I'm glad I was born into this legacy. No one is perfect, but the base is there, the solid foundation of integrity and humanity is there. I cherish this gift and I'm glad to see it's being carried into the future.

As the year turns once again, I wish love and laughter to all. I wish every child could know the love, comfort and support that my nieces and nephews know.... the same love, comfort and support that I grew up with and which carries me through every day of my life.

Peace On Earth, Good Will Toward All.

Here's a quiz for ya - How Smart Are You? ~~~ I got 9 out of 11. One error is a matter of interpretation, imo. The other, well, I had a lapse in biblical discernment. Sosume :)

And now... selected trivia:

In the late 19th century, millions of human mummies were used as fuel for locomotives in Egypt where wood and coal was scarce, but mummies were plentiful.

The average human produces 25,000 quarts of spit in a lifetime, enough to fill two swimming pools.

An American Animal Hospital Association poll showed that 33% of dog owners admit that they talk to their dogs on the phone or leave messages on an answering machine while away.

When the Black Death swept across England one theory was that cats caused the plague. Thousands were slaughtered. Ironically, those that kept their cats were less affected, because they kept their houses clear of the real culprits, rats.

The air we breathe is 78% nitrogen, 21.5% oxygen, .5% argon and other gases.

100 Things About Me
1. I hate these things and yet I do them anyway.
2. I'm a 5'7" redheaded woman with blue eyes and freckles.
3. I'm a redhead til I'm dead, regardless of how bleached my hair may get from age.
4. I liked growing up in central Kentucky. It was free from most natural hazards and poisonous creatures.
5. I used to hate spiders. Now I just really really dislike them and wish they'd live away from me.
6. I don't mind snakes, unless they're being sneaky. I like the feel of their skin.
7. I like the smell of horses, cut grass, honeysuckle, babies...
8. I make great use of my three most valuable innate skills: association, assimilation, and pattern recognition.
9. I am the oldest of 5 children.
10. I love my siblings. I am closest to my sister.
11. I love my parents. I am closest to my mother, but getting closer to my dad all the time.
12. I like soaking in the bathtub and letting the excess energy (stress) float away into the water so it may eventually go where needed.
13. I am 47 1/2 years old.
14. I like being me. I didn't always, but I learned.
15. I have had the privilege of knowing all my grandparents well. I still have a grandmother living. She's awesome.
16. I have the privilege of remembering a few moments with one great grandmother.
17. I learned how to be a friendly and sociable smart ass from my father's father.
18. I learned how to treat every person I meet with sincerity, fairness, and respect, from my father.
19. I learned how to care for people, sometimes at personal risk, from my mother.
20. I learned the habit of singing song snippets cued by words, from my mother. Makes life fun.
21. I have online friends who are as dear to me as anyone I have ever known offline.
22. I find it annoying that I have to refer to these people as eFriends to my family because most of them are not online.
23. I am Gemini Sun, Scorpio Moon, Libra Rising. That makes for a whole lot of people in my head.
24. I do not have Multiple Personality Disorder, technically.
25. I burn to a crackly crunch in more than fifteen minutes of sunshine.
26. I love to meet brand new humans and secretly welcome them to this lovely planet.
27. I like the taste of sauerkraut juice and dill pickle juice and lemon juice....
28. I don't mind ignorance at all, but I abhor stupidity, especially willful stupidity.
29. I am intolerant of intolerance.
30. I wear glasses because I'm myopic and I don't like bumping into things or seeing the world as a big fuzzball.
31. I think I will live to see the New Year when I'm 92, but won't stick around for my 93rd birthday in 2050.
32. I love mercury, the element. I love its silver fluidity, its weight, and its seemingly independent motion.
33. I love the color purple, but not that reddish violet color, I mean real (blue) purple.
34. I am inexplicably infatuated with the image of the Egyptian jackal-headed god Anubis.
35. I have little or no interest in traveling outside the continental US, except maybe to see the pyramids at Giza or in the Yucatan Peninsula.
36. I think I am a reincarnated Atlantean.
37. I think I may not bother to reincarnate again.
38. I have seen ghosts.
39. I have really long arms and legs. My arm span is longer than my height and it's not supposed to be.
40. I didn't get married until I was 33.
41. I am terrible at math, but great at logic. Go figure.
42. I know I existed before I was born, and I know I will exist after this body dies. It's just transformation.
43. I have a technical side and an artistic side which work well together into graphics and web design.
44. I have often been told I'm a great listener and give good advice.
45. I believe in the inherent goodness of people and trust them until they force me to re-evaluate that trust
46. I have good instincts and my intuition has improved with age.
47. I have created my own patchwork of spiritual beliefs and views of the cosmos which I'm constantly revising.
48. I remember feeling slighted when I was little, and I know it was just because my siblings needed more attention at the time. It still hurts.
49. I sometimes cry over really stupid stuff, but I've learned that's okay.
50. I prefer cats rather than dogs.
51. I don't like to go to the dentist unless something is hurting me more than the dentist can hurt me.
52. I have a really low gag threshhold and even the suggestion of hair in my food can make me gag.
53. I don't think bodily functions are all that funny. In fact, I'd like to skip some.
54. I can make software dance. I used to break software for a living. Same process, different purpose.
55. I think I'd like to be cremated when I die. I just can't decide where my ashes should be scattered.
56. I tried a lot of different majors in college, incl computer science, vocal music, electronics engineering...
57. I have an Associate of Science Degree in Art, and probably enough leftover credits for a bachelor's degree
58. I am not a morning person. My best hours are from about 10pm to 3am
59. I actually get a cold sore on my lip after I have a picture taken. I think it's a nervous reaction.
60. I can make things work out even when there's not much to work with. There is always a way.
61. I can always find silver linings, always. They are always there. Sometimes it's a long search.
62. I have a hard time accepting appreciation, but I'm working on that.
63. I would choose these three books if stranded on a desert island: Shakespeare's complete works, the Bible, and a thick blank book to write in. (Guess I'd need a pencil too :)
64. I am one of the smartest people I know, and the main thing I know is that I don't know everything.
65. I got very high scores in spacial relations areas on SAT/ACT tests. I can visualize better than anyone I know.
66. I have a gift for being able to break down even the most complicated stuff so the simplest person can understand it.
67. I have a way of finding the essence of an issue or concept.
68. I am a master with metaphor, simile, and analogy. Everything can be explained with something else.
69. I am learning to allow myself to experience emotion without editing it to death.
70. I have also discovered that all the 'bad' emotion I unplugged in earlier years cut me off from a lot of good emotions.
71. I am sometimes overwhelmed by all the little marvels of this world and the wonder of this universe.
72. I cried the morning my youngest niece was born, before I knew that's what was causing the feelings of parting heaven, joy of life, and relief.
73. I have learned to temper my temper with a 5 second gap between anger and action.
74. I actually own a piano, which my grandmother has now because hers went kaput.
75. I can read music but I play mostly by ear.
76. I have been male in other lifetimes. I remember.
77. I have a very warm and sometimes powerful speaking voice.
78. I have a good singing voice but I usually only sing for me.
79. I think nearly all children and animals love me on sight. I reciprocate.
80. I will take suggestion, advice, expertise under consideration, but don't order me to do anything.
81. I am an extrovert, I even talk to people in elevators. Strangers often want to talk to me.
82. I am apparently perceived as a very open and available person, and I'm okay with that.
83. I often analyze stuff to death.
84. I once had a dream where I used astrological data to target optimal birth times and places for souls. I think it was memory.
85. I write a lot, then usually edit and tweak it to death before I'll release it.
86. I am a jack of all trades, mastered a few. It's hard to know just what to do when you can do almost anything.
87. I am almost tired of people telling me how clever I am. I know that. It doesn't pay much.
88. I don't work hard, I work smart.
89. I think I originally came to Earth by way of a route through Orion's Belt because that looks like the way 'home'.
90. I think I worked on or near Mars for a while as we terraformed Earth and worked on human genetics.
91. I was and have always been a researcher in cognitive processes. I've just done it through many guises and lifetimes.
92. I don't like being left. I preferred to be picked up, rather than dropped off.
93. I don't just like quicksilver, I -am- quicksilver.
94. I can think in HTML. I love the instant gratification of making webpages.
95. I love languages and symbols.
96. I am fascinated with Astrology because of its symbolic language and geometry and spatial relations.
97. I have often thought I was born about 50 yrs too soon because I'd really like living virtually, but corporeal reality is fun too.
98. I have a vivid imagination, but that doesn't mean it's all make-believe. A lot of it's true.
99. I didn't have nearly enough on this list on the first go, so I went back and stuffed more things in, sometimes randomly.
100. I would have been bored with reading this, long before now.
I'd like to point out that nothing on this list is for shock value or weird-o-meter points.

What's Your Element? Air
What kind of blogger are you? Social
What Kind of Soul Are You? Visionary
Which of your friends is most likely to get you to take these silly quizzes? Xan
What would you like to do to that friend to get even? I'm still working on it. :)

Link: Universal Declaration of Human Rights

In 1948, the General Assembly of the United Nations adopted and proclaimed the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

Why, then, should any member nation object to action which deposes a person or government of another member nation which has unquestionably violated this Declaration?

We take Human Rights for granted in the United States, but the nations of the world also recognize the concept. At least, they did in 1948. Have we lost this in the last 50 years?

Not only are we aware of countries still in violation of Human Rights, but we need to look more carefully at ourselves, here, in the United States.

Why aren't the nations of the world adhering to the Universal Declaration of Human Rights? Why aren't member nations enforcing this doctrine, particularly among member nations?

I can feel the holiday season ramping up. Always hectic, but usually fun too. I gotta remember to enjoy the journey and not let the dates on the calendar distort life too much, eh?

Frackinrassinfussingarflesnicket! <--- read: Frustration! I am SO frustrated when I see people working so hard to divide themselves up instead of coming together. It is completely exasperating, on any scale. WHY do humans work so hard to find differences when it would be so much better for all if they focused on similarities?

The latest annoyance (<--understatement) is in a dissertation written by the pastor of my mother's church. She's the secretary, and sends us a copy of their monthly bulletin. In this blurb the pastor says he's about to embark on a series of study which basically shows why everyone else but Christians are 'wrong' about God. PULEEEEZE.

Why are humans still doing this? Haven't we subdivided ourselves enough? Haven't we hurt and killed each other enough over this? More than enough? Way too much? Don't the various groups of extremists see that they are guilty of the very thing they're accusing the other extremists of doing?

Never in my life have I wanted so much to stand on top of the world and shout "QUIT IT!" Why must they pick on each other so? It seriously breaks my heart as I watch people using 'love' to judge each other, to malign each other, to beat each other up, and even kill each other.

Please, God, make it stop. You started it. They twisted it. Please, God, make it stop.

Dangit, Xan. Where do you find these things?
I've spent time in, or at least driven through, the states in red. I didn't count the states I've only seen from the inside of an airport terminal.

create your own visited states map

Mom & Dad arrived Thursday afternoon and they're visiting through Sunday!! So, I'm away and enjoying my folks in real life. :)

I am fiscally conservative and socially liberal, almost in the extreme in both cases. Do whatever you want, so long as it doesn't cost me anything, or hurt me, and don't try to make me be like you. I want this acid test to apply to all, not just to protect my own resources, my own well-being, my own individuality, but to protect all individuals in the same way.

I've noticed a reinforcement of one major thing during this election schtuff: People who think the government should redistribute wealth more evenly... usually have nothing.

The Have-Nots are the Gimmees, while they claim the Haves are on the Take.
The Haves just want to keep what they have, because they usually had to work to get it.

It's rather annoying irony really.
I wonder what it would take to make a viable Libertarian Party, and if it could be done without becoming politically zealous like the other two parties? I fear that may just be how sausage is made and my whole point is... I don't want a truly free-thinking, tolerant philosophy ground into mush and shoved into a casing. Dayam.

And now watch as the quicksilver churns... by making a political comment:
Kerry's concession today is an example of my problem with him and his credibility, or lack thereof. He and his group have been adamantly preaching that they would fight til the last, they would wait until every vote was counted, no matter what. They did not. I really do appreciate that they did not repeat the turmoil of 2000, BUT, neither did they DO what they SAID they would do, what they promised they would do. It's not so much that they had a choice, but that they made a big promise, had no idea if they would keep it, or even need too. It was reiterated in the wee hours of the night, emphatically. Then, a 'nevermind' came along with the concession today. For me, this is a classic example of saying what they think we want to hear, without the conviction of following through, without thought about what it is they're really promising. This is not what I want from government officials.

On top of Kerry's record of flip-flopping on issues, of saying he supported This, but he voted That way... I must say his last action as a presidential candidate has verified for me that I made the right decision. I guess it's the old addage, the reason the incumbent usually wins... It's the devil you know, vs the devil you don't. It's hard for me to know much about someone whose actions and words do not mesh.

Whether I agree with all of Bush's policies and decisions or not, I do feel that he is credible, that he believes what he says and will act on what he believes. That's all I want from a politician. Say what you mean and act accordingly. Alas, it appears to be a rare quality. If you want my support, you have to win my trust first. To win that, you have to walk your talk.

I'd like to be apolitical. I'd like for the whole country and the world to be apolitical. I'd like for all the walls to come down. We built 'em, let's break 'em. There is no Us and Them, there's only Us -- everyone and everything and every no-thing... all together as one thing. It would be really nice if this fact was recognized and honored, if we treated ourselves (therefore all) with respect and honor. Sure would cut out a lot of the violence. Let's argue over how best to be good to ourselves and each other, eh? I know a lot of factions think they've been doing that already, sometimes to the point of death, but they're really promoting "What I/We think is good for You..." We need to find goals and methods that work for the greater good, and eventually include most, if not all.

Yeah, I know, I'm a blind idealist and infernal optimist. But hey, I can dream, can't I?

Let's move on. Let's move forward. Let's learn to live together, and live well.